San Bruno Gathering

Our friend from San Bruno, who joined the church in college, was driving down with his family from Washington to California. On the way he stopped in Medford to visit. We got together at a barbecue at Beka's and caught up while the kids swam. He has a beautiful family.

River Rafting

Aaron took the kids on a rafting trip while I spent the day catching up on some church assignments and house chores. It was so nice crossing off some things on my forever long to-do list. But the best part was that the kids had a fantastic time in the rapids, despite being stuck up on a rock for about five minutes. Then we all headed to Justin and Tiff's for some dinner my mom made for the crowd. I can't wait to join them next time.

Cashing in our Auction Purchase

At our youth auction this year we purchased a soccer camp with Dave DeRurange. The kids have had practices for an hour each day this week. Even though Mary and Noah are the youngest Dave still makes it challenging for all the ages that bought the auction item. I think we really lucked out on this one.

Science Works

Today we packed lunches and headed to Science works with the Savages. I got a season pass so we can use it when we go out of town, even in Utah this Christmas. It was a little unreal that the kids were old enough to discover different rooms with bigger cousins. I can't believe how big they are all getting. Cameron had a hard time believing that the new dinosaur exhibit was not real since they move and make sounds. He wouldn't turn around for the picture cuz he had to keep his eye on this T-rex.

New Calling, here I come...

Today I got sustained in my new calling. I am a mix of emotions. When Aaron got a call a couple of weeks ago to meet with President Dixon, we knew it was to teach seminary. He's had this calling two times before. This is an overwhelming and exhausting calling even though it is such a blessing working with the youth and immersing yourself in the scriptures. Immediately the thought came to mind to team teach. I thought that if we taught together it could ease some of the burden. In many ways I think the Lord prepares us for callings often before they come. I could sense it with this one.

I am sad to leave primary. Things are running smoothly and I have loved working with our presidency and all the ward leaders. Last Sunday, before a final decision was made, I spoke in a ward and just felt so much love for the people there. It was a special feeling that looking back was another step in the process of my release and call.

Today we had a ward conference. Mollie was sad about the release she just learned about yesterday. We hugged and cried. It was definitely a touching moment. I told her I would continue to finish my responsibilities until a new secretary was called. I have a lot to do for primary these next couple of months. I will miss this crew.

After the ward conference and our ward meeting we had a family dinner with the Savages. The kids played outside for hours.

Cosmo and Family Visits

Damian's friend from college came today for a week long visit. Rich used to be Cosmo, BYU's cougar when I was in college. We went swimming at the Broesders when they arrived. The kids are really enjoying playing with them. They have a girl Mary's age and three teenage boys that Noah and Cameron follow around.

Today is my Dad's birthday. He is taking my cousin's from France to various places. He and Otto Roger took them to Hollywood, the Grand Canyon, and today they hiked the narrows with Sarah's Dad. I hear that they thought it was amazing. They think that the fact that we don't drink alcohol, coffee, or tea is a strange sacrifice our church requests. I know my dad is hoping to share the gospel with them. They haven't been interested I guess, but I am sure that hanging out with Pop for hours every day will make them wonder what it's all about. He has such a special and kind spirit about him, and that is the most special kind of missionary work.

Fishing Date Night

For date night Aaron and I went fly fishing at Lost Creek. We got Eliza to babysit and we drove the peaceful 40 minutes to an awesome fishing spot. It was such a nice conversation and so refreshing. Date nights help bring some balance into my life, and I love them. Despite the slimy rocks we had to walk across in our tennis shoes the evening was perfect. It was beautiful and fun learning and trying something new. Plus, I caught 3 small fish! But because they were still alive and squirming around I made Aaron take them off the hook and release them back into the water. I'm still a wimp.

Pioneers & Hard Work

I came across this post today on Aaron's cousin's blog and it was amazing! It made me rethink some of my parenting. And in honor of pioneer day and those hard working inspiring individuals, I thought it was worth reposting, pictures and all.

Teaching Children To Work

Long ago, back before the button was invented (and I’m not talking about the kind of button that keeps your pants up), eight-year-old children would wake up before the sun and go out to milk cows. Ten-year-old children would make bread from scratch. Twelve-year-old children would saddle their horse and bring home lost sheep.

Now there is very little for an American child to do besides enjoy one leisure activity after another.

But just because we don’t live on farms anymore doesn’t mean we can’t still teach our children how to work. Scott and I encourage our children to work from a very young age. So far all of my daughters can wash dishes by hand, unload the dishwasher, make cookies from scratch, put sheets on their own bed, make simple dinners on the stove, fold and put away all their own laundry and wield a paintbrush.  My four-year-old son can water plants, wash windows, bring groceries in from the car and open the door for me when I am pushing the stroller.

Ironically with all of this working my house still seems to be mess. But that is because we are a project family.

I was told once that the key to building confidence in children is not with compliments but with accomplishments.  We are not perfect at this, but here are some things we have learned so far:

1. Complaining is Wonderful

. . . because that means they are doing something hard. We are not afraid of complaining. We tell them we love to hear them complain because that means they are growing. Any time a routine is changed there will be complaining, every time a tradition is changed there will be complaining. But once they get into the new routine (and if we are consistent), that will become the new tradition. Over time, every family develops a unique culture based on their traditions. In our family we are trying to build a culture of work and industry.

There are ways you can minimize the complaining, though, like this:

2. A Prepared Mind is A More Agreeable Mind

A child who knows they have to work at a certain time does better than a child who is told, all of the sudden with no warning that they must go out and weed the garden. Even though kids aren’t “busy” the way we define busy, they feel like they are busy and we still need to respect that. We’ve learned that asking them to do a job when they are in the middle of a fun game or book results in a lot of foot dragging and eye rolling. Let their minds get used to the idea first. For instance, on the way home from the grocery store tell them: “When we get home everyone needs to help unload the car.” If you wait to tell them when you’ve parked in the garage and they are walking inside the house you might be too late.

Also, this helps a ton:  

Every Saturday this chalkboard is filled with jobs, and in the summertime, every DAY it is filled with jobs. Sometimes they are assigned to specific people, sometimes kids can sign up for what they want. But this way they are prepared and they know there is an expectation (and sometimes a time limit!) They also know that if they finish their jobs first, mom won’t interrupt them later when they are trying having fun.

3. Meaningful Jobs

Part of learning to work is realizing that hard work can make great things happen. Find jobs for them where there is a meaningful ending, not just moving rocks from one side of the yard to the other. Teach them the Law of the Harvest. Tackle big jobs a little bit at a time. If it is too easy they won’t feel like they’ve done something important and meaningful. If it is too hard they will get discouraged. Making the jobs an age-appropriate job is important. However, I do think children can do more than we think they can.

Naomi’s green hair

4. Working Together

My kids complained for YEARS about folding clothes. I would sequester them in a room  with a huge pile of clothes and not let them do anything until they were done. This always resulted in much fighting, and clothes folding became a detestable, unpleasant and excruciatingly long and inefficient task. Then one day I sat on the top of the gigantic pile of laundry and made them all sit in an area, far apart from each other. Then I sorted the clothes by pulling an article of clothing out  of the pile and throwing it at the owner. If I threw them the wrong thing then they could throw it at the real owner. It became quite hilarious to throw training bras at my four-year-old son who then got to throw them at his older sisters. There were clothes flying everywhere, faces were happy and we were done in twenty minutes.

I have learned that I can’t just expect my kids to work if I am lying in my hammock and pointing my finger. I have to show them how to work. In fact, teaching kids to work  means a lot of work for you. Unfortunately there is no way around this. :)

5. Learn To Live With This:

Paint on carpet.

and this:

Paint on ceiling

One friend of mine, whose children are all grown now, told me that children can’t do meaningful work until they are 12. I believe this is true. Kids younger than twelve are still developing their hand/eye coordination, their stamina, and their fine motor skills, and mentally they are still in a magical la-la land where standards of perfection are measured by how much pink paint can be used, not how it is used.  Rarely does their work turn out to be satisfactory. But that is not the point. They are children, not professionals. When the eggs drop on the ground remind yourself that you are not baking cookies, you are raising daughters. When paint gets on the carpet remind yourself that you are not painting a room, you are raising sons. Keep training them, keep the opportunities plentiful and don’t expect perfection. There will come a time when you won’t have to keep re-doing their work. But they won’t get to that point unless they’ve made a lot of mistakes first.

6. Turn Up The Volume

When possible, play their favorite music or book on CD while they are doing the task. We did this while we painted these bookshelves.

Danny was too young to paint so he got put in charge as the DJ and he was more than happy to hold the iphone and pick songs for the girls to listen to while they worked. They spent an hour joyfully painting and singing without one argument.

7. Take Photos

Take photos of great accomplishments.

Telling them “We have to take a photo of this!” tells them they are doing something that your family values.

Also, before-and-after photos can be a very powerful way to show children that even something that seems impossible is possible!

Before

After

This blog post is just another method I am using to get my kids to work. I want them to see that I value what they do so much that I want to tell the world. I want them to see that other people will value their hard work as well. And you thought this post was for Facebook. :)

8. Help Them See The Real Reward

People bribe their kids all the time. I do it too. Babysit your brother and I’ll give you a cookie. Wash the car and I’ll give you a dollar. Practice the piano every day for the next 10 years and I’ll buy you a ferrari.

Clean out the grout in my bathroom and you get whatever your heart desires

But you know when your child has learned the value of work when the product of their work becomes the reward. They will see that if they paint their room their reward is that they have a brand new room that they can decorate and feel happy about. I try to make sure my children realize what they’ve accomplished by having them take a moment to sit down and really appreciate what they’ve done. (My dad would literally take a chair and sit down opposite his finished project and gaze at it for hours.) I explain to them that now something exists that didn’t exist before, and that they are not just painters or organizers–they arecreators, and that is a divine quality. I remind them what the project was/looked like before their hands touched it, molded it, painted it; that before they came a long this was just a pile of sticks, or a marked up dirty wall or a messy room. This takes a while for children to learn, but I believe that eventually they will learn that hard work can make their dreams come true.

9. Work = Happiness 

When I was 21 years old I came home from college for Christmas break. I had just broken off an engagement and I was sad, depressed and at rock bottom. What did my dad do? He put me to work. I spent many hours that Christmas in his shed, painting little benches for nursery children. I learned for myself that work can be a great medicine. My children don’t understand that yet, but someday, when they hit rock bottom, they will come home, I will hand them a paintbrush, and we still start working together. And then they will understand what I am talking about, and all my hard work will pay off.

I would love to hear how you help your kids work and what projects they have done. Then I will share it with my kids. We can always use more inspiration. :)

Eliza's Camp

Eliza is holding her girls basketball camp this week. Her profit will go to purchasing a new ipod, since her old one got cracked. I love that Justin and Tiff are having her earn the replacement. Eliza puts on a great camp full of drill, technique, games, and darling t-shirts. Mary is loving it.

Summer Rainstorms

Is there anything better than a summer rainstorm (without lightening)? The kids built a cover on the grass. It was a nice smell out there.

Pool Fundraiser

The kids decided to start raising funds for a pool, which we are dying to have. So, they set up a lemonade and baked goods stand outside our house. Unfortunately we live on a 40 mile per hour road, which isn't an optimal selling location. Fortunately for us three friends stopped by at the sight of all that cuteness. Jared said he'd match watch they earned, which they collected at when we met at Tiffany's for s'mores later in the evening. The total earnings, including Jared's contribution, was $6.52 (we got a tip from the Broesders).

If you...

Tonight we took a nice Sunday stroll at the Elk Park. Then we hung out on the grass. Aaron grabbed a ball from the car and started to play the "If you" game. He announces a fact like "if you are wearing blue" then throws the ball and all those who are wearing blue must run after it. Cameron kept getting upset that he wasn't catching the ball, so a few times Aaron would say " If you are 3 years old" or "If you are wearing a alligator shirt" (it's his favorite shirt--I am constantly washing it).

But the funniest one was when I said, "If you pick your nose"...and all the kids ran except Mary. When Noah beat the others and retrieved the ball, Nikki said, "That's not fair I'm the only who picks my nose!!" Hilarious.

Ward Picnic

Tonight was our annual ward picnic. We ate barbecued hot dogs and hamburgers while the kids ran around on the jumpy houses. I just really love summertime.

Hey Babe

Noah got the flu bug last night. He was feeling fine by late morning, but I still wouldn't let him go play with cousins, which was where Nicole and Mary were today. He watched a few movies and was just bored to death. He says to me, "This is the worst day of my entire life!" So funny, that boy. Cameron kept calling me babe this afternoon. I'm not sure where he got that since Aaron doesn't say it. But when a little 3 year old says, "Hey Babe!" it is just so funny to me.

Emigrant Lake

Mary and Annie's friend had a birthday party today at Emigrant Lake water slides. We made a day of it and brought all the kids to the lake shores to play and soak in some rays. It was really relaxing, despite the muddy areas the boys were so interested in. I love summer!

The 'L' Word

Two of these darlings in this picture have a case of the something that starts with a 'L' and is not very nice. As you can imagine what our day has been like...I've washed every single item in our house and treated every person (even though five of us don't have it..). It's been a lot of work and I've been grossed out and itchy just thinking about it.

Our Walk and Our Talk

Nicole woke up feeling fine. She was super hungry which is always a good sign after the stomach flu. She then got to playing with her dolls. Here she is prepping Hallie and friends for their "pa-forance". So cute.

Sarah came over to bring some Alaskan souvenirs. She bought treasures for all the nieces and nephews. It was so thoughtful of her and the kids loved them!

I reread this Friend article by President Uchtdorf today. I just love this message for our family. I've been keeping it in mind as I've been busy mothering today and it's helped me quite a bit. I should keep this idea in mind for our back to school 2014-2015 theme.

"Because love is the great commandment, it ought to be at the center of everything we do. Love unites families. Love is the power that initiates friendship, tolerance, and respect. It overcomes hate. Love is the fire that warms our lives with joy. Love should be our walk and our talk.

Love is the measure of our faith and the inspiration for our obedience. Love is the way of the disciple.

Let us be known as a people who love God with all our heart, soul, and mind and who love our neighbor as ourselves. When we understand and practice these two great commandments, we will begin to understand what it means to be a true disciple of Jesus the Christ."

Love Him So

Several times every day I am reassured that I married the right man. This morning during scripture study was just one of those moments. He and Mary snuggled up and read the verses aloud together. Then when he returned home from work he picked up a sick Nikki to ask her how she was feeling and if she was okay. And when he arrived home from the movie How to Train a Dragon 2 with the non sickies he shared a photo from the movie theater for me, cuz he knows I need to take a photo every day. He's so thoughtful, loving, and well...seriously good looking. How did I get so lucky?

When the kids hold your phone...

you end up with 300 plus selfies of your children's face. I handed Cameron my phone for a few minutes during church today, which was only one hour due to the regional YSA conference being held in our building. It's always a treat seeing what they capture.

All the Idiarts arrived home today, some last night. The birthday boy loved visiting with Luci during church. It was also nice "not celebrating" Damian's birthday together. He certainly doesn't love any fuss. Happy 40th Big Brother! xoxo

Lunch and Stuff

I am loving our lowered bar. I love handing the kids their lunches as they sit on the whimsical bar stools. Even Hallie and Dana loved lunch on the island. We spent the rest of the day swimming at the Harnoises (I'm nervous to lose my tan) followed by dinner with our awesome Elders and much needed haircuts for the boys. I love Saturdays.

7-11

It's 7-11 day! Aaron took the kids to 7-11 for free slurpees when he returned home from work and just after we spent the afternoon swimming. My mom babysat all morning during my presidency meeting and all evening when we grabbed a bite to eat with the Harnoises. The day just slurped by.